Abstinent Today:

I am a gratefully recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time.  †

I just proved that I can host a birthday dinner at a popular restaurant and make everyone feel special without eating one single thing there.  My daughter’s birthday wish was to go to a very popular Cajun restaurant, at an hour at which none of my meals coincide, so I ate several hours before we went and did not feel deprived even when the desserts were passed around for tasting.  That is not my food any more than jewelry at a store is mine or racecars on pit road.



From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.” — Just For Today

It is amazing to me how many parts of that little “Just For Today” card have become a regular part of my life!  When I first came into the rooms, I was overwhelmed by all the reading material.  As one who was always too impatient to finish reading a book, I was drawn to the little card, and a few pamphlets in my newcomer packet, as sort of a jump-start to my program.  I figured I could try to do one thing on that card per day, and I did.  But as I kept on trying to fulfill one statement each day, I found that habits developed, and I was doing several others.  I don’t think I’ve ever fulfilled all of them, but this quiet half-hour one is really important to me.  At the time I began, I would never have imagined spending the time it takes to read, reflect, and write what I do now.  No way!

God, I’m excited about how You grow me into what You want me to become.  Please keep doing Your work in me and show me where I need to stop resisting.  I am so prone to resist change!



From Proverbs 16, NIV:

23 The hearts of the wise make their mouths prudent,
and their lips promote instruction.[c]

I recognize that I am drawn to the scriptures on speech lately, but I am fostering such a bent because of my most glaring character defect.  I would like for God to use my words, both spoken and written, for His glory and to the edification of my fellows.  This proverb almost feels like I failed a litmus test.  As bitter as my mouth (and pen) can be, there is no denying that I have a lot of growing to do when it comes to wisdom pouring out of my heart in the form of prudent speech.  My! but those criticisms just flow like rushing water!

God, I recognize that I cannot be patient without a little disappointment, and I cannot be both loving and judgmental at the same time.  Make me Your version of me, and make my nature one of light and life, so that I do begin to overflow with encouragement that comes from a clean, pure heart motivated by love with obstacles cleared by forgiveness.    Help me see everyone through eyes of grace, so I can be loving.



From my reading through the Bible, currently in 2 Timothy 4, NIV:

Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.

What a delicate balance Timothy is called to perform!  Correcting rebuke along with patient encouragement sounds like a tough mixture.   I don’t know if it is for me to correct and rebuke since I am no one’s preacher and hold no pastoral office, but all of us are called to encourage each other (Hebrews 3:13) and to be patient, gently instructing even those who oppose us.  (2 Tim. 2:25-26)



From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 47:

Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach. That was growth, but if we wished to grow we had to begin somewhere.






*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.

† For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.