Abstinent Today:

I am a gratefully recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time. †

 

 

From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“We learn to give our loving support to others freely, without trying to advise people or change them.” — The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous, p. 175

I remember one time at our high school football game, the running back fumbled the ball for a horrible loss, and the glitter-adorned cheerleaders weren’t even phased. It was like they didn’t even know what that odd-shaped brown leather thing on the field was. They cheered, “Do it again! Do it again! Rah rah rah!” Do it again?! He just fumbled for a loss you idiots! But they were excited to be there, and excited to be supporting their team, whether they understood what was going on behind them or not. I’m not sure if anyone on the team even heard them, because in order to support the team, they were facing us in the crowd, in an attempt to get us all to get excited about our boys on the field.

I am learning this at what could not be a better time in my life. My children, who are now young adults, like any other humans, resent being told what to do; but they respond quite nicely to praise and the sharing of my experience when I remember to phrase it in terms of “I” and “my” rather than “you” and “we”. So I am more of a cheerleader now than a coach. Instead of fussing and fuming on the sidelines, yelling at referees and throwing my hat in disgust, I am engaged in support and encouragement, even if I am less acquainted with the details of their game.

It is like that in recovery. Each one of us is playing our unique game with our own specific details. We have our own misconceptions of our Higher Power and our own fears and resentments. Some of us have long histories of counseling and therapeutic attempts at resolution. We don’t need another expert. We need someone to walk with us, to cheer us on, to love us even when we drop the ball, maybe even to be ignorant of our fumbles. I don’t need to be your food expert, and I can’t be anyone’s higher power, but I can hurt, laugh, love and cry alongside anyone who cares to walk alongside me.

 

From Proverbs 5:

7 Now then, my sons, listen to me;
do not turn aside from what I say.

Solomon’s words to his sons translate well the Father’s voice to His children as He calls us to huddle in and follow diligently the play as He calls it. It is not for our harm or our to deny us anything pleasing that He speaks this admonition, but to save us from the broken despair that results from turning away from God’s perfect plan. A slave or a hired servant may seek to rebel from the way of the Master, but as children, as heirs with relationship as our bond, we are certainly inclined to listen and to follow. The love in this call comes from that kind of relationship. He seeks our good not harm, and holds great things in store, so I choose faithfulness to honor my Abba Father, the Owner of the universe and Provider of my needs.

 

From my reading through the Bible, currently in Romans 15:

5 May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had, 6 so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

 

13 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Wow! God shows up when I look for Him! This is just the kind of encouragement I was talking about trying to become. The God of enduring encouragement will help me achieve, no, GIVE me a selfless attitude like Christ’s. How exciting!

 

From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 55:

We can only clear the ground a bit. If our testimony helps sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail. The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you.

 

 

Footnotes:

*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.

† For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.

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