Abstinent Today:

I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time.  †

I hate it when this happens!  I get up thinking I will do my devotions later and that to prayerfully dedicate my day to God is all I have time for before starting out on my alternate plan.  At some time later in the day I inevitably run into a situation or set of circumstances that prove I had no business starting off without aligning my mind and spirit with God and His purposes. I find myself in the state of “RID” – Restless, Irritable, and Discontent.  At the risk of messing up the acronym, I might even add hungry to the list.  When will I learn?  Even on a day when church attendance is what is postponing the plan, I have no business shutting myself off from the daily system that works for me.  I think I just need to get up earlier on such days.  Something has to give, and it might as well be my rest time.  (My doctor may disagree.)




From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority— a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience.…” — Tradition Two

I like it when God is in charge of a meeting; it means two things to me: that I am not in charge, and that no one else in the room outranks me.



From Proverbs 17:

12 Better to meet a bear robbed of her cubs
than a fool in his folly.”

My family knows this and, while I cannot prove it, I think they have a non-verbal signal for “Daddy’s having a bad day,” because they all tend to flee my presence without me running them off.  It’s one of the markers of my most shameful character defects, and represents the scars of the harm I have done in the past, but it remains to be true.  It was good for me to read this today, just to be reminded of it so that I can be alert to making sure I don’t growl or bare teeth when I feel like I do right now.

I regret that this is not a more inspirational devotion, but what good would it do for me to keep an online journal if I tried to lie my way through the tense times?



From my reading through the Bible, currently in Luke 11:

The Lord’s Prayer, teaching on division and spiritual warfare, a chastising of the need for miracles, and encouragement to let our lights shine all come in this chapter before Jesus lowers the boom with a series of “woes” (or curses).  Those who think God should only be positive all the time have an unrealistic picture of God, and may find themselves in this chapter as His opponents.  The woes are pronounced mainly on the arrogant religious, for whom Jesus showed absolutely no tolerance.

52 ‘Woe to you experts in the law, because you have taken away the key to knowledge. You yourselves have not entered, and you have hindered those who were entering.’”

The self-righteous fakers do more harm for Christ’s global church with their hypocrisy than a hundred self-aware heathens ever could.  Jesus expressed His frustration with and curses upon those who would drive away an earnest seeker with their expertise and rules.



From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 62:

“Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.”





*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.

For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.

‡ From “Our Invitation to You” out of Overeater’s Anonymous:  “The OA recovery program is patterned after that of Alcoholics Anonymous. We use AA’s Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, changing only the words ‘alcohol’ and ‘alcoholic’ to ‘food’ and ‘compulsive overeater.’