I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time. †
From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:
“I put them up, one at a time, in a corner of my bathroom mirror and read them over and over until they became recorded in my mind.”
My brain is a programmable engine. The trouble is I have been programming it with self-defeating thoughts and concepts most of my life. Now, I attempt to program it with only positive, encouraging thoughts, and this VOR contributor has used one of the same tools I do. My bathroom vanity is home to several sticky-notes, each with a Bible verse or Twelve-Step Program quote. As often as I see them, I recite them to myself, encouraging myself to believe and expect the good things contained in them. Showing up at meetings, I get to hear such cheers as “…acting on life rather than reacting to it,” and “…you’re worth it!” Standing at my mirror, I am reminded that, “He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds,” “…the life I live in the body I live by faith…” and, “Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.”
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Philippians 4:8
From Proverbs 6:
“23 For these commands are a lamp,
this teaching is a light,
and the corrections of discipline
are the way to life”
You mean every correction isn’t a direct impeachment of my character, a body-slam of my personal value and esteem? It is the way to life! Discipline like that must come from Someone who values me far more than I value myself. I am used to berating myself for every 99% grade for the missed point I should have gotten. Balancing on a fulcrum of self-pity between achievement and shame, I have never found peace. But God has taken me off that teeter totter and has placed me in a garden of grace, where I am free to learn and discover all He has for me, as I make mistakes and move on, loving and discovering the other fallible humans He has put near me, none of us better or worse than the other, but all of us made to serve the next and love Him in community.
From my reading through the Bible, currently in Mark 16:
“6 ‘Don’t be alarmed,’ he said. ‘You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him.’”
“19 After the Lord Jesus had spoken to them, he was taken up into heaven and he sat at the right hand of God.”
God’s not dead, and Jesus is alive right next to Him! From there, Christ intercedes on our behalf, and the Father dispatches Holy Spirit to whom He will. (John 14:11-21) I serve a living Savior!
God’s Not Dead!
From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 130:
“This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose, accompanied by a growing consciousness of the power of God in our lives. We have come to believe He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fellow travelers are, and that is where our work must be done. These are the realities for us. We have found nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness.”
*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.
† For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.