I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time. †
Today would have been my grandfather’s birthday. I called my mother last night and suggested we get together a few of the friends and family and have a birthday dinner in celebration of his life though he has gone on to celebrate in eternity. I suggested that we could even do as he often recommended and chew each bite of food at least twenty times. He was known for eating slowly, and many times we all waited for him to finish. He was very healthy even until his death at a ripe old age. My suggestion was a hit, but schedules do not allow for such a dinner today. We will sup tomorrow, God willing. It felt good to honor my grandfather and assuage my mother’s grief with this suggestion. (I know well the menu of the restaurant we have chosen, and have a pre-selected meal planned, so I can participate without anxiety.)
From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:
“Those of us who live this program don’t simply carry the message; we are the message. Each day that we live well, we are well, and we embody the joy of recovery.” — The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous, p. 106
Embody joy! Now that’s something I never thought I would do. In fact, I believe it may have been a point of my despair. I believed in the One from whom joy comes, but I was not experiencing any. Now I see what was blocking it: me. Living the program of recovery opens the door to embodiment of joy by removing self-interest and replacing it with God-interest.
“Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 37:4)
From Proverbs 16:
“20 Whoever gives heed to instruction prospers,
and blessed is he who trusts in the Lord.”
The predicates in this proverb indicate action. Heed reminds me of hearing with deed attached, and would not be heeding without the action of the deed; and trust is the faithful action of leaning into one’s belief. I can believe a rope will hold me, but trusting it means putting my weight against it at my own risk. Prosperity and blessing apparently come to those who lose themselves to act on faith in obedience.
God purify me that I may bring You joy and that others might be attracted to Your reflection in my life.
Consuming Fire (Fuego de Dios), Christ for the Nations
From my reading through the Bible, currently in Matthew 24:
“12 Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13 but he who stands firm to the end will be saved. 14 And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.”
“44 So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.”
Jesus speaks plainly about the end and the coming Day of the Lord, though scholars still argue about it. Such dispute casts doubt and makes belief for others difficult. These things I know: Jesus Christ Immanuel (God with us) wins; and He will deliver those whose faith is steadfast in Him. The words of this chapter are trustworthy, and the One speaking is the Faithful and True, my Higher Power and Deliverer, the Architect of my creation and the Benefactor of my restoration.
From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, “Bill’s Story” page 16:
“Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish.”
*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.
† For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.