Heart Spring 1 by Suzie Cheel (click for source, Fine Art America)

art by Suzie Cheel

Abstinent Today:

I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time.  †




From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“Accept that a bite or two will not make a bad situation better.” — Think First

One bite is too much and a thousand are never enough!  I was listening to someone say that “moderation is key” to a successful weight-loss plan (which she was marketing to unsuccessful dieters), and it occurred to me as I argued in my head with that speaker, that she may be right concerning some people, just not me, and apparently not any compulsive overeater I have ever met.  If moderation is the key then my lock is broken!  Have you ever seen a lock that’s been broken for a long time?  People stick all kinds of things into it, either convinced what they have will finally do the trick or just curious about how many toothpicks and gum wrappers will actually fit in a keyhole.  All my attempts at weight-control were just keyhole stuffing!  The only thing I have found that works is abstinence – total, unequivocal avoidance of between-meal snacking and my problem foods and behaviors.  I just don’t trust my broken lock for security.  I accept it as a non-locking mechanism, and I put my valuables elsewhere.  Instead of having my prizes in the pantry, they are now in prayer, meditation, reading, writing, serving others, fellowship, communication, even movement.  “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:21)




From Proverbs 7:

15 So I came out to meet you;
I looked for you and have found you!”

The temptress is doing her homework!  The devourer is diligently seeking his opportunity.  I’ve heard it said that “our disease is doing pushups in the parking lot,” waiting for us to finish our recovery meeting to again attack us at full-force.  The description of the young man in this story is one of the unprepared, the one who has not made up their mind ahead of time about what they will do when temptation beckons.  The antidote is described ten verses later:

25 Do not let your heart turn to her ways
or stray into her paths.”

I have to hold tightly the reins of my own heart, steering it onto the path of recovery, of gratitude, contentment, of alignment with God’s righteousness and peace. 




From my reading through the Bible, currently in Matthew 15:

As Jesus parried the accusations of the hypocritical Pharisees, He spoke of reigning in the tongue because of its connection to the heart.

18 But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean.’ 19 For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.”

Jesus was sought out by a gentile (non-Jew) woman.  At first He neglected her, set on His mission to save the children of Israel, God’s chosen-first people.  As she humbly begged Him for the attention a dog under the master’s table might get, He was moved to pronounce healing for the Canaanite woman’s daughter, who was healed at His command.  I was stirred at the reading of this story, and thought that woman could have been my mother, because I am not a Jew.  It could even have been me!  I was afflicted, I was standing outside the grace of God, in need of healing… in my spirit, my mind, and my body.  Though I had nothing that entitled me to Him, Christ answers!  He answered the Canaanite mother, and He answers me.

One might expect that, as a compulsive eater, I would have been more interested in the miraculous multiplication of food that Jesus accomplished for a second time in verses 29-39, but no, it was the gentile mother thing!  He will not let anyone who humbly approaches Him go neglected.  In Matthew 18:14, Jesus said, “In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.”  He also promised, “For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” (Matthew 7:8)




From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, “The European Drinker”:

“For when a man is truly trying to do God’s will, instead of his own, he is very conscious of being in the presence of God always, wherever he may be.”







*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.

For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.