Abstinent Today:

I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time.  †

I was excited to find that K-LOVE Radio’s free download right now is “Don’t Give Up” by Calling Glory.  I can’t tell how many times I found myself struggling with something and heard the words of this song cheering me on to complete the task at hand.  Now it’s on my phone for anytime playing.   Nice!





From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“We now needed a more reliable way of relating to a Higher Power. At this point we learned we could ‘act as if.’” — The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous, p. 14

Even with my religious background (and maybe even because of it) I had some grudges against God when I first came into program, losses I resisted reconciling against my inflexible understanding of God, whose grace and kindness, according to me, would never allow such injustice as my pain.  So the phrase, “act as if” took a different meaning for me.  Instead of acting as if God was really there, as some have had to do to overcome doubt, I acted as if God did not cause the things I resented.  Gradually, I came to act as if, even if He did allow or cause these things, He would not have done so without good reason.  Now, I fully believe this, and concede not only that all my pain serves to bring about my good, but the losses along the way were also within His careful, considerate plan.  I know God’s will isn’t the only one being carried out in the earth, and that is all the more reason to pray for God’s will to be done, but I also know that “in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose,” (Romans 8:28) and “The Lord works out everything for his own ends.” (Proverbs 16:4)

One thing I do not question is my love for the Lord my calling according to His purpose.  Believing these verses and the blessings therein, I have no reason to fear.  Now all that is left is the other meaning of “act as if” – that is to match my behavior to these beliefs.

Precious Provider, help me believe Your Word and act accordingly.






From Proverbs 10 (NKJV):

32 The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable,
But the mouth of the wicked what is perverse.”

The disparity of the duplicitous comes when the behavior of the body doesn’t match the knowledge of the mind.  It is my goal to be of one mind, purpose, and motivation.  It is this integrity of living according to faith that is my aim.





From my reading through the Bible,” currently in Daniel 3:

King Nebuchadnezzar made a giant gold statue and decreed, “Whoever does not fall down and worship will immediately be thrown into a blazing furnace.”  Daniel’s three friends demonstrated integrity, even when it would cost them their lives.  They refused to bow down and worship any but the One True God.

17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. 18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”

The three men were seized and cast into a furnace so hot it killed the guards who escorted them.  They were delivered, however, by a fourth man who appeared among them in the flames, one who looked, according to Nebuchadnezzar, “like a son of the gods.”  Astonished by what he witnessed, but still misguided concerning his fervor for religion, the king issued a new decree.

28 Then Nebuchadnezzar said, ‘Praise be to the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who has sent his angel and rescued his servants! They trusted in him and defied the king’s command and were willing to give up their lives rather than serve or worship any god except their own God. 29 Therefore I decree that the people of any nation or language who say anything against the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego be cut into pieces and their houses be turned into piles of rubble, for no other god can save in this way.’”

I want to demonstrate the kind of character these three men had, the kind that says, “God is able to deliver me, but even if He doesn’t, I will not waiver.”  I want to trust in the unseen Son of God, who walks with me in my furnaces and delivers my from my death sentences.  I want to introduce Him to people I meet because there is no other who can save like He can.  But I want to refrain from cutting into pieces those who do not accept or recognize Him right away, because the freed prisoner has no right to incarcerate his neighbor.  What was I but a reluctant believer until He called me out of the flames?





From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 73:

“More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn’t deserve it.

The inconsistency is made worse by the things he does on his sprees. Coming to his sense, he is revolted at certain episodes he vaguely remembers. These memories are a nightmare. He trembles to think someone might have observed him. As far as he can, he pushes these memories far inside himself. He hopes they will never see the light of day. He is under constant fear and tension—that makes for more drinking.”






*Abstinence began for me on May 11th, 2010.

For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.

In order to shed light on the old truths from a different angle and exercise my willingness with a little change, I switched from using the New International Version (NIV or “NIV1984”) to the New King James Version (NKJV) just for this month’s reading of Proverbs.