Abstinent Today:

I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more* day at a time.  †

What a fantastic day yesterday was!  I prayed for God to give me an opportunity to be helpful, and He did something amazing: He opened my eyes to several opportunities that had already been there, but I, in my self-absorbed little bubble, had not seen them.  I was so excited to capitalize them, I didn’t even pause to dress appropriately.  Now, my gym sneakers need replacing.  That’s what I get for wearing them as street shoes in the first place!

 

 

From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“I learn in Overeaters Anonymous that my powerlessness is the bedrock on which I can build a new life.”

It is National Suicide Prevention Week.  (World Suicide Prevention Day is September 10th, annually.)  One thing I know from experience with people considering suicide, and having been one myself, is that rarely does anyone want to die.  They just cannot find the hope to believe that the life they are experiencing will ever change enough to satisfy them.  The short way I put that in conversation is, “We don’t want to die; we just want to stop living like this!”  The reality is that the connection to one’s own sensory perception of their painful experience and the desperation with which they cling to getting their own way are the primary obstacles to overcome.  Glimmering hope before their eyes rests on these two things.

Compulsive overeaters like me are committing slow suicide, some not so slowly.  A testament to this is our prevailing attitude of “Who cares?  Who wants to live long anyway?”  When all the doctors say, “Lose some weight or else…” and I find another doctor rather than comply with the orders of the first, I have chosen the “or else.”  I heard someone recently say they were allergic to food-X but they still ate it sometimes.  My thoughts raced to judgment…until I remembered I have done the same thing.  The consequence is death, but we keep eating.  Disease!  We pretend we don’t care.  The reality is we don’t care enough about ourselves and we don’t believe there is anyone who does.  We have promoted our low opinion of ourselves to Ultimate Authority, and we yield to the rule of King Food, who has ordered our execution.

There is a simple song the words and melody of which I learned before I learned any other.  Its meaning, however, eluded me until just recently.  Now that I am in recovery, it means more than ever.

Jesus loves me.   This I know.

For the Bible tells me so.

Little ones to Him belong.

They are weak but He is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me.

Yes, Jesus loves me.

Yes, Jesus loves me.

The Bible tells me so!

With His opinion of me elevated to its proper position, and my experiential sensory perception demoted to its proper place, I can begin to allow the Creator to re-create me from this bedrock principle up!

 

 

 

From Proverbs 12:

The words of the wicked lie in wait for blood,
but the speech of the upright rescues them.”

Given that “wicked” stands for the self-centeredness that, since the Fall in Eden, is the default characteristic of all mankind, and that “upright” refers to the condition of being “righteous” or in like alignment with the only One who is right, this verse translates into an ironic emphasis to my previous thoughts on saving the suicidal, and a confirmation of the mission of the Twelfth Step of Recovery: “to carry this message to compulsive overeaters and to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

Note: The OA recovery program is patterned after that of Alcoholics Anonymous. We use AA’s  Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, changing only the words “alcohol” and “alcoholic” to “food” and  “compulsive overeater.” (From Overeaters Anonymous “Our Invitation To You”)

The super-cool truth of this same passage is that, there are varying degrees of life.  My Higher Power, Jesus, said he came that we might have life, and have it more abundantly, or “to the full.”  (John 10:10The last statement of this chapter promises that once life is attained, there is not only abundant life of vitality, but to continue on that path leads to another rung of life to be lived for eternity!

28 In the way of righteousness there is life;
along that path is immortality.”

I want to start living the vibrant, vital existence, connected to the Source of all Life, right now.  My eternity begins today, one moment and one day at a time, and I will live it by the grace and to the glory of God!  Anyone want to walk with me on this path?

 

 

From my reading through the Bible, currently in Jeremiah 39:

This chapter tells of the darkest day in the history of Israel, but even in it, God’s will was done.  Jerusalem was invaded just as God’s prophet, Jeremiah, had predicted.  And the king, who was warned to submit, fled instead, and suffered the dire consequences.

When Zedekiah king of Judah and all the soldiers saw them, they fled; they left the city at night by way of the king’s garden, through the gate between the two walls, and headed toward the Arabah.[b]

But the Babylonian[c] army pursued them and overtook Zedekiah in the plains of Jericho.”

God’s prophet, Jeremiah, was spared and provided for by order of Nebuchadnezzar, who had heard of his prophecies.  The palace advisor who had rescued Jeremiah from the miry well was spared by God.  It is the promise to this official I found moving today.  It fuels me to seek God’s righteousness and work to save others in their miry wells of despair.

17 But I will rescue you on that day, declares the Lord; you will not be handed over to those you fear. 18 I will save you; you will not fall by the sword but will escape with your life, because you trust in me, declares the Lord.’”

Thank You, Dear Lord, for the promise of Life, abundant vitality now, and eternal existence with You!

 

 

From Overeaters Anonymous (Second Edition):

“The amazing secret to the success of this program is just that: weakness. It is weakness, not strength, that binds us to each other and to a higher power and somehow gives us an ability to do what we cannot do alone.”

 

(For the sake of accountability, the details of my eating are posted in my online food log.)

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