Today:

I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more day at a time.

 

From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“Working the Twelve Steps is about learning to accept the gifts of willingness, surrender, sanity, serenity, and humility from my Higher Power. God is doing for me what I cannot do for myself so that I can carry that message to those still suffering.”

Our powerlessness is not a bad thing.  It brings us into an understanding that we need One who is powerful.  Hopelessness is not a bad thing either, because it is in discovering we are at a dead end we become willing to turn around.  God wants to do the work in us that the Twelve Step Program helps accomplish – to condition our hearts so that we turn to Him, accept His grace and power, and lovingly serve one another.  Step One serves, not to overwhelm one with brokenness, but as a turning point of self-assessment.

I am thinking of two mice in a maze.  One reaches a dead end and stops.  In despair, he sits down and begins the slow death of dehydration and malnourishment, convinced this is all there is.  As his health begins to deteriorate, he wonders what the purpose of his life was, why he lived such a meaningless existence, where all the cheese he had once hoped for was, and what kind of sick mind stuck him in this predicament.  He begins to hate the walls around him and whatever built them.  He cries out for death but it, like the cheese he once craved, fails to come on his command.  He remembers the other mice in the colony from which he came, but the pain of their memory makes him despise them. He lays down and dies alone in his bitterness.  The other mouse, coming to a similar dead end, sniffs its corners and examines its edges.  He presses gently against the walls to ensure they are immovable.  Then, without much hesitation, turns from the impassible obstacle to seek a new way.  Wouldn’t it be nice to be the latter of these two mice?

 

From Proverbs 27:

Do not boast about tomorrow,
for you do not know what a day may bring forth.”

Like a mouse in a maze, I do not know what happens next.  I could not possibly!  This instruction not to boast about tomorrow occurs at least one more time in Scripture.  James explains that bragging about one’s intentions as though they were set and ordered constitutes evil boasting, and suggests instead that we offer, “if it is the Lord’s will,” before any such statement, to show our proper place in the plan.  He compares our lives to a mist that momentarily vanishes in the wind.  He adds that putting off what we know we ought to do, because we plan of having time to do whatever we want, is also evil.  (Reference James 4:13-17)

God, show me what I have put off, and keep me from vanity.

 

From my reading through the Bible, currently in Isaiah 60:

“The Glory of Zion” is the heading of this chapter, and it is a beautiful prophecy of the New Jerusalem yet to come and the spiritual Kingdom of Heaven that has already arrived.  What I find amusing is that, whatever I used to think I was sacrificing in order to live in God’s providence, whatever I had resisted surrendering, is all garbage compared to what He has for me.  Trading my will for His can hardly be considered a sacrifice!

1 Arise, shine, for your light has come,
and the glory of the Lord rises upon you.
See, darkness covers the earth
and thick darkness is over the peoples,
but the Lord rises upon you
and his glory appears over you.”

17 Instead of bronze I will bring you gold,
and silver in place of iron.
Instead of wood I will bring you bronze,
and iron in place of stones.
I will make peace your governor
and righteousness your ruler.”

 

From the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 276:

“Now there is a sense of belonging, of being wanted and needed and loved. In return for a bottle and a hangover, we have been given the Keys of the Kingdom.”

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