Today:

I am a recovering compulsive overeater, abstinent by the grace of God one more day at a time.  For details, check out my food journal.

 

 

 

From today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

“The amazing thing is that, as I grow in this program, I find less and less to be angry about.” — For Today, p. 90”

 

The contributor continues by telling what sounds like my story: “Before OA I was angry all the time. Everything, including traffic, job challenges, fussy kids, or my uncooperative spouse would fill me with rage. My family never knew when I would explode.”

 

I have said before that “fat is hate’s physical form.”   It explains why, when one begins dealing with their interpersonal issues and allowing God’s will to take priority, constantly sacrificing self-will, the insulation layer we built to keep ourselves protected and isolated begins to melt away along with the need for our addictive substance(s) of choice.  Today, I would rather accept hardship as an opportunity to demonstrate God’s omnipotence than to shield myself from any such.  The scraping, pulling and tugging on my life is not me being abused, it is the hand of the Creator reshaping and rebuilding me into His useful tool for increasingly noble purposes.  More than freedom from physical weight, I rejoice at the liberation from the emotional tonnage that kept me in a constant state of frustration!

 

Dear Father, I thank You for freeing me from hate, fear, and rage, one day at a time.  Help me love others today with the love You have given me.  May my behavior and speech reflect that love at every moment, and keep me from clouding the reflection of Your grace with my pride.

 

 

 

From Proverbs 30:

I saw my old angry self in these verses, and it makes me sigh, aching over the harms I have done, and recognizing the many missed opportunities to fulfill my purpose.  I spent so much of my energy missing the point and driving it into the flesh of those around me!

 

11 There are those who curse their fathers
and do not bless their mothers;
12 those who are pure in their own eyes
and yet are not cleansed of their filth;
13 those whose eyes are ever so haughty,
whose glances are so disdainful;
14 those whose teeth are swords
and whose jaws are set with knives
to devour the poor from the earth,
the needy from among mankind.”

 

 

 

 

From my reading through the Bible, currently in Psalm 54, 55, and 56:

 

I love the way David prays!  He cries for deliverance, and doesn’t wait for it to come about before thanking God for it.  His faith allows him to express thanks before his prayer is answered.  He trusts his Deliverer.  Psalm 54 demonstrates this, and so do so many other prayers of David.  Verse 4 is a great representation of the assurance that allows David to pray this way, and it is a great affirmation to include in my own prayers:

 

4 Surely God is my help;
the Lord is the one who sustains me.”

 

In Psalm 55, I read a lot of the same kind of trusting gratitude of David, but even amid great despair.  It reminds me that, just because God is good and works for our good, we will not be free of hardship.  As I look back over the psalm, I see what looks like a familiar pattern.  David was not freed from his emotions any more than any of us are.  He just experienced them, acknowledged them before God, prayerfully released them to God, trusted in God for remedy, sacrificed his will to God, and thanked God for His omnipotence.  Abridged, that might look like: pause, pray, proceed.

 

4 My heart is in anguish within me;
the terrors of death assail me.”

 

16 But I call to God,
and the LORD saves me.”

 

22 Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you;
he will never let the righteous fall. “

 

23b But as for me, I trust in you.”

 

Psalm 56 is a similar prayer song with some more nuggets of faithful trust:

 

3 When I am afraid,
I will trust in you.
4 In God, whose word I praise,
in God I trust; I will not be afraid.
What can mortal man do to me?”

 

13 For you have delivered me from death
and my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before God
in the light of life.”

 

Precious Savior, when the troubles of today come, help me to remember all You have saved me from in the past.  Keep me faithful to trust You, for You are a faithful Deliverer!

 

From The “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, “Smile With Me, At Me” page 347 of First Edition*:

“From that day years ago, I gave, still give and always will give time every day to read the word of God and let Him do all the caring. Who am I to try to run myself or anyone else?”

(*Note: This story was omitted from later editions of the Big Book.)

 

 

OD@aT:

“Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.”  3 John 2

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