I am abstinent by the grace of God, one more day at a time.    My house is feeling the pinch of the floundering economy.  I am doing my part to whittle away the parts of my budget that I can do without, and trusting God to provide.  It is sometimes a stretch, but He has been faithful to provide just what is needed just in the nick of time, as only He can.  He has a way of putting His signature on things by doing just that.  I am exploring some less expensive menu items to help out.  Fresh is best, but it isn’t always available, and quinoa is great, but on an oatmeal budget, oatmeal may have to do.  Today I tried a less expensive alternative to quinoa called “Bob’s Red Mill 10-Grain Hot Cereal.”  Even with cinnamon and a quarter cup of low-fat milk, it tasted a little like wallpaper glue, but “food is fuel, not fun.”

 

From Today’s entry in Voices of Recovery:

Self-will, ego, and denial will always lead me back into self-destruction with food.”

I will never reach a point at which I am immune from the call of food.   Acceptance beats denial, submission defeats ego, and service trumps self-will.  Each day, I can start out on the right track if I practice a routine that contains these ingredients.  Then, as my day progresses, I find that I have to revisit them at each decision, making acceptance, submission and service the fulcrum under every choice.  If I allow self-will to have a say in even one decision, I begin to detour into diseased thinking.  I cannot serve both God and self-indulgence!

From Proverbs Chapter 9:

12 If you are wise, your wisdom will reward you; if you are a mocker, you alone will suffer.”

 

Here I find another warning that self-will, in my routine manner of mockery, or self-loathing pointed at others, will only harm myself.  The wording of this verse even reminds me that while I alone will suffer, I will be alone when I suffer.  Isolation, that cocoon I manufactured for safety’s sake, became the sarcophagus in which my disease entombed me.  God has freed me from that grave condition, and has called me forth to proceed under His power, in His wisdom, to do His bidding.  I am so grateful for my freedom from death, and its precursor – fat, that anything He asks seems dwarfed in comparison.  What can I do but love Him with my every action, my every decision?

God, thank You for freedom, for serenity, and for abstinence.  Please forgive me when I act in an ungrateful manner, forgetting Your deliverance.  Give me a dose of Your power to meet each moment, Your love to care for others, and Your way of life to guide me.

From my reading through the Bible, currently in 2 Chronicles 21:

Jehoshaphat had seven sons, but the first one, Jehoram, pampered above all the rest, was given the throne.  When the king died, Jehoram, apparently an insecure king, murdered his brothers and married into Ahab’s family, establishing the ways of Ahab as practices in Judah.  As a result, there was division in the nation of Judah.  Edom and Libnah rebelled because of Jehoram’s departure from God’s ways.  Even after receiving a warning letter from the prophet Elijah, Jehoram refused to mend his ways, and suffered a gruesome death by disembowelment. “20 Jehoram was thirty-two years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem eight years. He passed away, to no one’s regret, and was buried in the City of David, but not in the tombs of the kings.”

Jehoram was given the opportunity to do great things for a great people.  All he had to do was follow in the way of his fathers, but he chose to go his own way, to serve his own purposes.  The end result was disease, death, and disgrace.  I can’t help but consider his life as an example of a failure to apply the principle of the Proverb for today.  Had he applied wisdom, he would have been rewarded; but mocking his fathers, despising God, and going his own way, he alone suffered, and died in dishonor and was even ostracized from his family in burial.

I bet he didn’t make that decision all at one time.  I’m guessing, based on my limited experience, that the path he ended up on was achieved one little compromise at a time, caving to his fears rather than standing firm in the Presiding Power that installed him as king.  Vigilance is the only thing keeping me from going the exact same way.  I choose life!

From The “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous, page 86:

We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while. What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.

 

3 John 2, “Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.” – OD@aT

~TLJax

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