From Voices of Recovery:

“Serenity is knowing and accepting that God is in charge.”

Shortly before coming into the rooms of OA, I shocked my wife with the announcement that I had come to the understanding that “my way is not the only way.”  Once she picked her jaw up off the floor, she congratulated me on arriving at adulthood.  The program of recovery has taught me something else about my way: not only is it not the only one, it is usually not the best way.  Working through the painful reality of Step One, that I was powerless over food and that my life had become unmanageable, and practicing that principle in all my affairs, recognizing in Step Four how many things my terror-filled grip of false power had contributed to the disarray of my unmanageable life, I became convinced that my way was almost universally detrimental.  This realization made accepting God’s way much easier for me.  Steps One through Three have often been oversimplified as “I can’t; God can; I will let God.”  I have known part two of that, but part of me believed that God wanted or needed my help with parts, or maybe it was impolite to accept His hospitality for the whole tab, so it was up to me to do part of it.  It was only in Step One, as I applied it to all my affairs, that I finally admitted there is nothing I can do my way that wouldn’t be better if I waited on the Lord and did it His.

I have developed a little exercise that helps me accept stressful situations.  It goes like this:  Even if the worst case scenario happens, won’t God still be in charge?  Aren’t I content to be in His care?  Then why get anxious?  (Pray the serenity prayer, breathing deeply with each phrase.)  Acceptance accomplished!  (Repeat as necessary.)

From Proverbs 4:

13Hold on to instruction, do not let it go; guard it well, for it is your life.

When I was nearing my heaviest, I rode a roller coaster the harness of which didn’t click securely, but gave an impression that it did.  Halfway through the upside-down loops and rolls, the harness popped open, leaving me horrified, desperately gripping the harness down against my chest.  The words, “Hold on…do not let it go…it is your life,” remind me of the urgency of that day, yet it is instruction to which I am urged to cling with that urgency.  Instruction is the infusion or application of authoritative direction.  That sounds like acceptance of the way of a Higher Power to me.  God, help me cling to You and Your will as passionately as I gripped that harness the day You held me in that roller coaster!

From my reading through the Bible, currently in 1 Chronicles 1-3:

Okay, I’ll admit, finding inspiration in long genealogies is tough, but I am amused to watch for what pauses the author from his list.  Occasionally, a relationship, achievement, or event will warrant a hiccup in the cadence of the drumroll of history.  Verse 10 contains such a reference to “Nimrod, who grew to be a mighty warrior on earth.”  I have no delusions of grandeur or need to be recognized, but part of me wonders if when people remember me after I’m gone, will I be a name in a list, or will my life at least have a footnote.  The name “Peleg” (which means “division”) was given to a guy who lived in the “19time the earth was divided.”  I also find it interesting that no one prior to the flood was listed except those in the line of Noah.  Some question whether there was more than one original couple or whether Adam and Eve were the only people divinely created.  That question seems moot in light of the resetting of the flood.  Whether from one original couple or not, we all are traced back to Noah, where the nations of man all share one common earthly father, who can be traced to Adam only nine fathers before him.

In Chapter 2, the pauses seem to be more for squeaks in the wheels of the clockwork: a wicked son, whose line was cutoff (verse 3), an incestuous incident that bore explanation (verse 4), a trouble-making thief (verse 7).  There is something to be said for being a name in the list with no side notes, when they are like these.  Others include those who died with no children, or no sons, another note I am blessed not to have by my name.

Chapter 3 reminds me that Solomon was not the first of David’s sons, but he was chosen to carry the promised dynasty.  What follows is a review of who’s who of David’s line, separated by the exile during Zedekiah’s reign.

Holy Father, who blesses me far more than I deserve or could ever repay, grant me contentment to be listed among those who are Yours.  I need no other recognition!  You are in control; I am not; and I am pleased that it should remain that way.  Your will, never mine, be done!

From The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous, page 5:

Before we came to OA and began discussing our experiences honestly with other compulsive overeaters, we didn’t realize how much we had damaged ourselves and others by attempting to manage every detail of life.  It was only after we began to recover that we saw the childish self-centeredness of our willful actions.  By trying to control others through manipulation and direct force, we had hurt our loved ones.  When we tried to control ourselves, we would up demoralized.  Even when we succeeded, it wasn’t enough to make us happy.  We hid from our pain by eating, so we didn’t learn from our mistakes; we never grew up.

Have a blessed day (OD@aT)

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