Voices of Recovery today quoted page 3 of Overeaters Anonymous (2nd edition), “We believe that no amount of will power or self-determination could have saved us. Times without number, resolutions and plans were shattered as we saw our individual resources fail.” The contributor goes on to contrast wanting to and willingness. “If I had waited until I wanted to abstain, I might be dead by now. Yes I was willing…” “I can’t do this with my own will power. I need the program of Overeaters Anonymous, God, the Steps, and the tools to recover, one day at a time, for the rest of my life.”

Proverbs 17:19, “He who loves a quarrel loves sin; he who builds a high gate invites destruction.” The first half of that verse may give some indication to what is wrong with most of my family. We love to know more than the other guy and win an argument, even if we have to manufacture the facts. (God, save me from that character defect.) The second half is a mystery to me. I have usually looked at it from a security standpoint, as if it meant that modest security measures make the evil eye look to somewhere else. But through the eyes of recovery, I can see that these two halves are linked. The love for arguing demonstrates a perversion of the soul, as does isolation. Anyone so afraid of letting people in as to build high gates around his estate is caging himself in with his biggest threat – himself. God, save me from my own tendency to shut You and everyone else out of my life!

In Judges 3, I read the beginning of a series of Israel’s rebellion, followed by their oppression, followed by their cry to God for help, and His perpetual deliverance. The cycle seems familiar from my own series of joy, rebellion, misery, helpless dependence, and relieved satisfaction of God’s grace and mercy. It seems the only way to stop the cycle is to learn contentment in God’s grace and mercy.

One of the delivering judges, Ehud, rescued Israel from a king known for his obesity. The sword used to kill him was swallowed up by his belly fat. As he escaped the king’s guard, Ehud ordered, “Follow me…for the LORD has given Moab, your enemy, into your hands.” (v.28) This reminds me of those who have gone before us in this program of spiritual recovery, from Bill and Dr. Bob, to the crowd at Gamblers Anonymous, to Rosanne, to every speaker, sponsor, and newcomer who has sat in the rooms before me. I am grateful to be following the footsteps of those who have slain King Fat and have attached themselves to a victorious Higher Power, who has and will continue to deliver me one day at a time, as long as I remain it fit spiritual condition.

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