Today’s Voices of Recovery entry spoke of praying for a “spirit of forgiveness” when forgiveness doesn’t seem to come naturally. It occurred to me that praying for a spirit of peace could work just as well. While I am struggling to accept what is going on with my sick friend, I am reminded of the original version of the Serenity Prayer that asks God for the “grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed…” This sounds like I’m getting it wrong just by struggling with it! I need to just relax, and keep from frustration because I don’t know what God will do. I know what He CAN do, and I know I can’t do ANYTHING, so what else is there, but to trust Him to do what He will do? “Be still, and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)

I haven’t been eating over this, but if self-pity were nachos, I’d be in full relapse! I have been so consumed with my own hurt, fear and confusion that I have lost focus on helping others. Occasionally, I am forced into the opportunity to serve, but I have not been serving those to whom I owe the greatest honor and devotion, and my relationships have suffered for it. I have, at least, been weeping with those who weep (Romans 12:15), and trying to be as supportive as I can under the circumstances. I think, since I can’t affect any change in Mark’s condition, I need to have the courage to be as supportive as I can to his visiting family. Is that “the wisdom to know the difference?”

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