I’m still recovering from the shock of a significant loss. I am grateful for a friendship dear enough to hurt this badly over. This is the kind of grateful I have learned in the fellowship of recovery that comes from working the 12 Steps. I was able to accept my friend’s death and find something to be grateful for all in less than 24 hours.
 While this gratitude may be a new flavor of my abstinent life’s sanity, I have to admit that abstinence does not make me superhuman. Poop still stinks, and pain still hurts! I am exhausted in ways that only physical and emotional exhaustion combined can account for. And, while I was celebrating my Higher Power’s divine providence and knack for preparing me for one circumstance by allowing me to experience something only slightly less difficult, it occurred to me that something tougher might graduate my way.
 Enter a trial I had to face this afternoon! Not as significant as a loss by death, but certainly a chance for me to point a critical finger at myself over my prejudicial service to others.
 Healthy sized and healthy minded does not always mean only healthy thoughts and behaviors. I am still an imperfect human making progress.
 It occurs to me that freedom from compulsive overeating does not mean freedom from all obsessive and/or compulsive thoughts or behaviors.  In fact, an obsession to work diligently toward an end could be a great asset when working the Steps, and compulsive behaviors replaced with the use of the tools turns into great fuel for service-oriented action.  I still wear the same head I always had, it’s just screwed on differently than it has been in the past.
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